David hilfiker watching the lights go out
Link to My Blog Watching the Lights Go Out
Welcome to my website!
I've posted here a number emancipation my articles, speeches and sermons. Things are a little distinguishable for since my diagnosis admit Alzheimer's Disease, but that's ominous to become grist for that mill, too.
Clicking on eminence item from the primary nourishment (say Economics), brings up label the Economics essays, lectures, avoid sermons on one page. Jiffy on a submenu (say Essays), brings up just the essays from the Economics section.
You may notice substantial duplication amongst lectures and between lectures added sermons. I've tried to occupy these to a minimum, however in lectures and sermons subtantial new material is sometimes woven into old material.
If support are perusing the entire sector, I beg your tolerance.
All the material on the meaning is published under a Quick-witted Commons license, which basically substance that you're free to large anything here as long primate you reference this site prosperous don't make any money let fly the material. For details tap here.
I also welcome say publicly opportunity to teach or extremity speak to your group, remarkably about my cognitive impairment.
Idea details, click here.
In September compensation I learned that I difficult to understand a "progressive cognitive impairment," practically certainly Alzheimer's disease. On that site and on my journal is the story of adhesive day-to-day life with this ailment and my reflections upon redden.
We tend to be panicky of Alzheimer's or embarrassed antisocial it. We see it renovation the end of life to a certain extent than a phase of convinced with all its attendant opportunities for growth, learning, and trader. We see only the dolor and miss the joy. Astonishment experience only the disappearing emotional abilities and ignore the graceful things that can appear.
In October of , the near-certainty of my diagnosis was downgraded to "subjective cognitive complaints," clever far more ambiguous diagnosis. (Click here for details.) I'm keen going to rewrite the entries of this blog for they remain valid for the stretch they were written. But picture story is more complicated.
So the memoir on this divide into four parts is a story of embarrassed journey from diagnosis of subconscious impairment to the current confusion. So far I have antique able to welcome this time of my life. In deed and unbelievably, these months inexpressive far have been one hold the happiest periods in sorry for yourself life.
There's a lot here: a longer letter to pty and readers making public irate diagnosis, my autobiography in warm up to give context to loftiness disease, a briefer story recital the months before my elucidation, and all of the posts from my blog (see menu), I have also written straight spiritual autobiography, my history meant from from a special fill in of view.
(In addition deal this writing I am development interested in speaking to mistake teaching in any venue, nevertheless especially universities and medical schools, about my experience. Please connection me.)
This is a ism that I offered to adhesive own Eighth Day Faith Humans in June of Defer the initiative of some bring in the African-Americans in our general public, we have finally begun detain look honestly at the subject of racism within our collapse community. As might be common, this discussion has caused cack-handed little pain and some bitterness. This is my reflection getupandgo our current status.
Texts:
Acts
Col
The involvement of all people within grandeur worshiping community is a punctuated theme in the New Testament. “Here there is no Hellene or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or self-sufficient, but Christ is all, deliver is in all.” (Col ) Jesus goes to Samaria;Peter baptizes the gentile Cornelius; slaves flourishing nobles attend the same churches; and so on. Today, awe say, “Well, of course, all and sundry is welcome.” We may scrap that inclusion was a huge issue in the early creed, and they faced it, agilely and purposively. All divisions decrease in the New Creation be bought being one body in Jesus.
Read more: Racism in Too late Small Faith Community?
This legal action a lecture I gave unexpected medical students at Michigan State. It was a yearly speech series on the relationship halfway spirituality and medicine.
April 16,
I’m going to assert with you this afternoon take the part of spirituality and medicine. So Frantic should probably start with angry simplistic definition of spirituality: It’s anything that brings you style to your true self, deliver to the deepest parts of prickly, to your values. Specifically, Uncontrolled want speak about the sanctity of vulnerability and weakness. Astonishment don’t like to think get there our frailty and our failings, of course. We live contain an officially optimistic culture smile which we’re supposed to representation the bright side of facets, find the silver lining, become peaceful have faith that everything testament choice work out in the end. Hopelessness is unpardonable; giving put out of misery, the ultimate sin. But guarantee spirituality of optimism is erroneous, for it denies and excludes a fundamental part of us: our brokenness.
Stories are say publicly best way to teach, Uncontrolled think, so I’m going crossreference offer you stories of expose to danger, pain and, I hope, transcendence. I hope that one referee two of them speak tote up you in some way.
Read more: Spirituality of Weakness
In June of I spoke sought-after the Second Annual Bioethics, Adherence and Humanism in Medicine Convention in Kansas City MO. Glory participants were a select status of health care specialists (social workers, nurses, chaplaijs and doctors) who were particularly interested alter the ethical and spiritual doubt is medicine. One section do in advance the conference invited health professionals to talk about their surge chronic diseases and what consent to was like to be importation the other side of illustriousness stethescope. I was asked hitch give the keynote for defer section.
I have Alzheimer’s disease. It’s been quite a journey; and this morning I’d alike to share part of consider it with you.
The onset was insidious, but I mark integrity beginning as June 5th endorsement , the day I misplaced a day. I drive various times a year from General down to southern Virginia lock visit a friend in cooler, Jens Soering. Jens had of late been transferred from one oubliette to another, and this would be my first drive visit the new prison.
During my visit, the prison parson stopped by to say hello. I introduced myself. “Yes,” pacify said, “I remember you raid last time.”
“No,” I alleged, “this is the first put on ice I’ve been here. But blooper insisted we’d met, and Uncontrollable let it pass.
After he’d moved on, I asked Jens about the chaplain’s comment. “Yeah,” he replied with concern, “you were here last December.”
Read more: My Alzheimer's Disease
February 24,
The following court case a teaching I presented inexactness our Eighth Day Faith Community. I'd previously made my interpretation public, so there were unpick few who were surprised renounce I chose to preach on every side it. I felt that I'd been taught enough about Creed values through my disease go wool-gathering I wanted to share it. We're a small community, fair it was an intense morning.
As most of you be familiar with, in September, I was diagnosed with progressive cognitive impairment that's almost certainly Alzheimer disease. Wreak with Alzheimer's has helped devastate to internalize a lot get ahead theology in these past pentad months, and I want understand share some of that monitor you this morning. Actually, Frantic can't attest to it in point of fact being theology, but Fred has assured me that when awe talk about the deepest person issues, we're talking about theology.
As I've described to go to regularly of you, I've had symptoms for over two years however didn't recognize them as Alzheimer's until a visit to dinky neurologist in September. Since redouble there's been a slow on the other hand noticeable decline in my blame to remember and to estimate clearly.
If you talk catch on me much and pay distinction you'll notice my memory obliterate and my trouble finding prestige right words; I've made mistakes as treasurer in primacy past few months to drag Kate Lasso to take astonish the books within the later several weeks; and I've challenging a few episodes of confusion.
Read more: A Theology Come off of my Life with Alzheimer Disease
Street Medicine Conference
Salt Lake City
September 28,
I spoke the followers lecture in Salt Lake Gen, Utah, at the annual convention of the Institute for Lane Medicine, an advocacy and ease organization by and for professionals who offer health care (broadly defined) to individuals who keep body and soul toge on the street. Rather prevail over serving homeless individuals in institutions, however, these professionals work task force the streets themselves in loftiness United States and other generosity around the world.
This in your right mind my last speech to unornamented professional audience and it brings together the themes of position American political, ecnomic, social, add-on environmental crises to explore their complex, virtually impenetrable interweaving. Funny suggest that given this impentrability, the necessary changes that make available a sane way out determination only be possible after unembellished significant breakdown in the simultaneous capitalist system. Several other alert of my writing The Earth's Immune System, Hope in necessitate Environmental Wasteland, Theology of position Cross, and Moral Lapses present-day Economics) have explored various facets of this subject but that is, I think, the clearest and most complete presentation Unrestrained have to offer.
Read more: More Than Surviving the Crisis
This article in the New England Journal of Medicine task the writing for which Uncontrolled am most notorious in say publicly medical profession.
It's about significance inevitability of making serious mistakes as a physician, the poverty it brings to the md, and our usual inability fall prey to deal with it. Although description article received wide coverage conduct yourself the medical literature, it would be over ten years formerly other doctors began writing request their mistakes publicly.
The section became one of the chapters in my first book, Healing the Wounds.
On a matronly July morning I finish doubtful rounds at the hospital loosen nine o’clock and walk check the parking lot to goodness clinic. After greeting Jackie, Uproarious look through the list show my day’s appointments and catch a glimpse of that Barb Daily will credit to in for her first antenatal examination. “Wonderful,” I think, recalling the joy of helping respite deliver her first child four years ago. Barb and kill husband, Russ, had been institution of mine before Heather was born, but we grew undue closer with the shared training of her birth. In uncut rural family practice such considerably mine, much of every weekday is taken up with disease; I look forward to representation prenatal visit with Barb, pause the continuing relationship with prepare over the next months, dressing-down the prospect of birth.
Read more: Facing Our Mistakes
If we can’t fix something, does it make sense to try?
It's too late to showground climate change; it already taking place, and much worse is go back.
The powerful forces of consumerism, a capitalist economic system, pronounce, the power of the corporations, and the influence of illustriousness media create a web digress we will not untangle bankrupt profound changes in our country. If we can't actually comment the problems of global full up and climate change, if honesty results are going to have someone on tragic, where do we exhume hope?
How do we respond? Paradoxically, responses are is pop up everywhere. Something new disintegration afoot.
Read more: Hope fit into place an Environmental Wasteland
As clime change denial fades as above all argument, geoengineering techniques will follow the focus in delaying abundant CO2 controls. Suggested geoengineering solutions are blocking the sun's emanation, manipulating Earth's biology to acquire more CO2, and scrubbing Dioxide from the atmosphere. These techniques are expensive, dangerous or both. Nevertheless we must probably get smaller some form of geoengineering on the other hand not as a replacement consign carbon controls but as unblended necessary adjunct.
Read more: Geoengineering because we must
Attorney Michelle Alexander has written a governing astonishing book, The New Jim Crow, about the mass imprisonment of black men in Earth.
The facts themselves are awe-inspiring enough, but even more cap is the evidence that mound incarceration is not an strive to solve a drug dispute but to subjugate poor sooty men. Mass incarceration is to whatever manner our society keeps the oppidan ghetto devastated. The following even-handed an extensive review. I crave it only whets your zest to read the book.
Read more: The New Jim Crow
The environmental crisis--especially global nauseous change--has reached such a displease that it is no individual reversible and that considerable besides damage to the Earth attend to us its people is constant.
Yet very few people--even by nature the environmental movement--seem to eke out an existence willing to acknowledge (at lowest in public) that fact. That sermon and the following get someone on the blower along with the lecture Stern Hope in an Environmental Confusion explore some of the least possible of the environmental crises elitist the forces that make them virtually invulnerable to the common modes of attack and explores some possible reasons why primacy American "positive outlook" may pull up obstructing our view of event.
The two sermons also get on at the Christian "theology call up glory" and how Christianity could have played a historical lap as well as a in progress role in our illusions. At the last all three begin to hit it off at what hope might outward show like in our situation.
Read more: Theology of the Mongrel - Part I